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Kevin Bloody Wilson
the worst of kevin bloody wilson
Bali Belly Song
ten days in bali, got four days to go
ten days of terror cos im glued to the throne,And im shittin' in litres and firin' both ends,i'll never shit solid again.

And its cost me a fortune for this holiday, stead of pissin' it up, christ, im shittin' it away.
cause im glued to the loo while my mates are out ragin', i'll never shit solid again.

I'll never shit solid again,
or hold anything down for aslong as i live, cause me arse is jammed open from freckle fatigue, i'll never shit solid again.

I called mum back home, she sed mix up a cup. of cornflour and gravox to thicken it up, then she pissed her self laughin and hung up the phone, i'll never shit solid again.

Just had a crap and im wipin me ring, havent quite finished, start spewin' again, Jesus, hope i remember to use the right hand, i'll never shit solid again.

i'll never shit solid again, so i'll rig up a faucet to stick up me ring, at least wen i fart i wont splatter me jeans, i'll never shit solid again.

I'm doin' cartwheels as i try to guess, a crap or a chunder- christ whats comin' next, will it spray through me fingers or run down me leg, i'll never shit solid agen.

slipped on some shit a foot thick on the floor, skid arse over tit, then i spewed a bit more, Now i gotta sift through it cause me denture fell in, i'll never shit solid agen.

I'll never shit solid again, me rings hangin' out n me guts have caved in, i'll be buried in a bucket and me mates will all sing- "he'll never shit solid again"
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